3 Ways Husbands Can Make Their Wives Feel Special This Mother’s Day
Mother's Day
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By Alicia Searl, Crosswalk.com
Gentlemen, it’s time. Time to start thinking about your beautiful wife and how you can lavish her with love this time of year. Sure, Mother’s Day honors her as a mom, and you may be wondering how your role as her husband plays a part in this holiday. After all, she isn’t your mother. Besides, if the kiddos create cute little crafts in school or church, you may be thinking that’s enough, right?
Well, to be fair, most mommas absolutely do love those sweet, meaningful handmade cards and gifts. But…there is so much value in acknowledging your bride as the mother of your children and taking the time to make her feel special, especially on a day that is meant just for her!
Honestly, I understand that as you get older, this holiday can be a bit perplexing. My husband faced these challenges as well. Because, let’s face it, once you have children of your own, you do feel this need to still celebrate your own mom while also trying to honor your wife. You may even find yourself confused as you wander down the card aisle, picking out a card and possibly flowers or a meaningful gift for your own mom, then pondering whether you should grab something for your wife as well.
The truth of the matter is, you should acknowledge all mothers in your life and extend sentiments to make them feel special on Mother’s Day. Whether it be a simple phone call or a card to your mom, a gentle hug for your mother-in-law, or a heartfelt voice message for your sister. It really doesn’t take much to show the ladies in your life some gratitude for all they do.
However, when it comes to the nature of your lovely lady, it hits home—literally. While your children may come home with sweet cards, you still play a vital part. It’s a moment to extend your sincere thanks and praise for her valuable contributions to your family. There are gestures that tell her you not only “see her,” but you truly want her to feel loved, cherished, and appreciated.
Photo credit: ©GettyImages/Chong Kee Siong
1. Simply Ask Her
While many men tend to be “black and white” thinkers, it’s a bit more complex for women, who tend to be a little more colorful in their embrace of emotions and events. That said, she may already have expectations for this holiday and how she wants to spend it. So, start with a simple and honest question: “Honey, how do you want to celebrate Mother’s Day and what would make it special for you?”
When you come from a place of humility, you gain better insight into how she really wants to spend the day. That said, being a mother means the world to her, but truth be told, she’s likely weary, worn out, emotionally depleted, and physically drained. So, if she doesn’t have an answer or reacts in a hasty or confusing emotion, reassurance goes a long way. Just a gentle response can remind her that you really do mean well and want to recharge her soul.
2. Tap Into Her Love Language
Of course, it goes without saying that speaking your wife’s love language is always important, but during a day that showers her with love, it is essential. The five love languages, based on Dr. Gary Chapman’s best-selling book, share insight into how we can give and exchange love that is meaningful to our spouse.
This Mother’s Day, get in tune with the way your wife naturally communicates love and meet her with compassion and purposeful intention, all in a means to fill up her love tank. Below are just a few ways you can speak her love language.
Words of Affirmation:
-Write a heartfelt poem.
-Create a list of positive adjectives that best describe her.
-Openly share your heart on how much she means to you and your family.
-Give her an affirmations devotional or book to help her recount the love God has for her and how much you cherish her as well.
Acts of Service:
-Clean the house. Let the kids help!
-Take care of the chores for the day.
-Create her favorite meal.
-Create a coupon book with ways you can “serve” her in the future, such as wash her car, make her coffee, bring her breakfast in bed, plan a date night (including childcare), etc.
Quality Time:
-Give her your full attention by being an active listener.
-Watch her favorite movie (with popcorn or her favorite snack).
-Get outside. Go for a hike or on a long walk.
-Be mindful of distractions such as your phone or maybe a work-related issue, and just be present. That is truly the best gift for a “quality time” girly.
Gift Giving:
-Homemade and thoughtful gifts are what will touch her heart.
-Flowers, chocolates, or jewelry are always nice, but to really get to her heart, think about what she really likes and enjoys. Gifts must be “meaningful.”
-Stock up on her favorite snacks and bring them to her in a gift basket.
-Take her on a surprise shopping spree, go thrifting, or visit her favorite store and get a gift that fills her heart.
Physical Touch:
-Snuggle up on the couch together.
-Rub her feet, play with her hair, or offer her a back rub.
-Give her the gift of a spa day.
-Be intentional about holding her hand and drawing her close to your side, as she views that as a romantic gesture and feels adored.
Related:
What Are the 5 Love Languages?
Learn to Speak Your Spouse's Love Language
Photo credit: ©GettyImages/FG Trade
3. Consider Her Season of Motherhood
As you may have already experienced, motherhood comes with many seasons that bring new challenges. Maybe she is enduring many sleepless nights due to cluster feeding a newborn, or maybe she is juggling a busy schedule with a social teenager. No matter where she is on this motherhood journey, consider what she may need and how you can meet her needs with gentleness, compassion, and understanding.
Ideas for the Mom with Littles:
If this is your wife’s first Mother’s Day, be sure to recognize that and prioritize the things that matter most to her. It could be as simple as giving her time to take a nap or dressing up the baby and heading to church as a family, followed by lots of pictures for her to cherish.
Mother’s Day with newborns and infants can be a tender and special time. You can create a craft with those sweet little hands, making them look like a bouquet of flowers, or head to the park and soak in some sun. But oftentimes, simple is best, and taking notice of what she needs will speak volumes to her.
Ideas for the Mom with Middles:
This season is ideal for your kiddos to play a vital part in making this day special. Give your children the opportunity to create personal cards and gifts and have a voice in how they want to celebrate her.
Maybe your wife wants to celebrate with her mom or sister. If she so desires, make it a bigger family affair and host a brunch or go out to dinner with all the lovely mommas in her life.
This can also pose as a great time to start your own family traditions. Maybe it’s taking a small family vacation or heading to a favorite restaurant that she really loves. Creating memories for the woman in your life who nurtures your family and spreads joy will be something you will look forward to repeating.
Ideas for the Mom with Older Kids:
Oftentimes, this season can be difficult to honor the moms in our lives, as teens and young adults are hard to pin down, especially if they are in college, taking final exams, and unable to come home (I speak from experience here). It can also be hard if your children have families of their own or live too far for a quick visit. Other times, this holiday may conjure up very strong emotions, especially if our wife is missing her own mother or a loved one that she is unable to celebrate with. Consider this your place to step in and step up. If it is just the two of you, approach this holiday with tenderness, as it may be a difficult holiday for her to embrace.
If your children live nearby or can get together, make that a priority and do all the planning. Having her children together or just getting to hear them, via a phone call or FaceTime, will surely melt her heart.
On a final note: Your precious wife may be the “heart” of the home, but you are the “leader.” Mother’s Day brings about so many beautiful ways for you to lead her with love and show her how special she is to you and your family. Enjoy this sweet holiday and make it a day to remember!
Related:
6 Things Your Wife Does NOT Want This Mother’s Day
14 Thoughtful Ways to Celebrate Mom as a Family
5 Heartfelt Gifts to Give This Mother’s Day
3 Ways to Love Your Wife through a Miscarriage
